Having spent a whole week on Rapa Nui I now, of course, am an expert on this magical, mysterious island. So I stand ready to answer all of your burning questions.
Question: As one of the most remote islands in the world, how did Rapa Nui become a tourist hot spot?
Answer: Credit Robert McNamara and the Cold War.
No kidding. Being more than 2,000 miles from anywhere, and with no natural ports, it did the island no good at all to have some of the largest and most mysterious statues in the world.
Fortunately, McNamara, JFK’s Secretary of Defense, decided that the U.S. needed a secret base in the South Pacific from which to monitor Soviet satellite signals.
And Easter Island was perfect because, as already pointed out, nobody could get there. And Russians, even in sweat-stained Bogart suits, would stand out like sore thumbs.
I am not making this up.
Long story short, the Americans ran their secret base in splendid isolation for several years. When they finally did pull out, they left a runway, a hospital and a power plant.
And just like that tourism came to Rapa Nui.
Q: So what’s the deal with Hanga Roa? For a bustling tourist town it’s not exactly Honolulu.
A: You got that right. Hanga Roa looks more like Cedar Key than Honolulu. Like they made the town up as they went along, and a stiff breeze might blow it out to sea at any moment.
This is by design. There are virtually no international brands – no Hiltons, no Burger Kings, no Starbucks – on the island.
Legally, only Rapa Nuians can own land on this island. And having been burned time and again by entrepreneurial strangers appearing over the horizon, they are reluctant to open the door to international investment and development.
Good on ‘em, I say. Hanga Roa is the sort of town that begs you to wear your sweat-stained Bogart suit and bring your wine cork-pulling African parakeet.
Q: Wait! Where are all the trees?
A: Good question. This island looks more like Ireland than Tahiti.
The original inhabitants slashed and burned the trees. And there are two schools of thought as to the consequences.
The “Collapse” school says the original inhabitants committed eco-side with their wasteful land use practices and, as a result, nearly starved themselves as the land degraded all around them.
The “anti-Collapse” school says the islanders were doing just fine, thank you very much. And that to the extent societal collapse occured it was caused by colonizers, slave stealers, missionaries…all of the above introducing smallpox.
Q: It is true that Rapa Nui is the original home of Rap Music?
A: Not exactly. It was actually the original home of Rapa Music. It’s an easy mistake to make.
Q: So how did they move those ginormous statues?
A: Opinion is divided. Some say they “walked” them via a complex process. Some say they rolled them on felled palm tree trunks.
And of course, anyone who’s ever seen The X Files can’t fail to notice the suspiciously saucer-shaped depression sunk into the island’s supposedly extinct volcano.
Personally, I like the Mandrake the Magician levitated ‘em school of thought. But that’s just me.
Q: Yeah, but why are so many of ‘em laying down on the job?
Again, two schools of thought.
Thought 1: That tribal warfare resulted in the winning tribes knocking over the moai of the losing tribes.
Thought 2: They eventually fell over on their own from neglect as slave raiders and diseases depleted the population to the point that the tribes could no longer do routine maintenance.
(Plus, Mandrake left the building.)
Q: What the hell is this photo all about?
A: Sorry, but I can’t visit a place without eventually getting on a bicycle. Having done so I had to establish my bona fides by laying down on the ground and artistically shooting one of the big guys through the spokes of my front wheel.
Nice shot, huh?
Q: What the hell is it with you and bicycles Cunningham?
A: Dude, I ride therefore I am.
Q: How come you know all this stuff?
A: Mostly from strategically half-listening to our very knowledgeable guide, Rapa Nuian and historian Christian Moreno Pakarati.
By the way, if you happen to run into Christian, please don’t share this blog with him. He’s a very modest guy and I don’t wanna embarrass him.
FreeGNV 